She said her name was "party"
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
