The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Randomize
