woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize