Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
