how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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