i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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