are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
