it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
