I love black thongs
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
