This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
