I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize