i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
