do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
