Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
