Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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