i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits