Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
