My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Randomize
