lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
