i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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