So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
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well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Two words: blizzard sex
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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