Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
