and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Say something about gay babies.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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