STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize