It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
