I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize