I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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