I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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