let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.