I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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