My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize