New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
