At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
