But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
