i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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