Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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