That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
