If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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