drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
