I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
