Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
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