but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
