Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
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Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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