Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
