i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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