508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
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