i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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