her vagine was all disorganized.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
