But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
