thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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