he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
